I Have Been Headhunted

The Star | Helen Grange

‘Live your best life!’ advises Oprah Winfrey. Tomorrow the talk show queen’s favourite life coach, Dr Martha Beck, will present a life coach workshop in Joburg. Helen Grange caught up with her South African protege, Judy Klipin, to find out more about her approach.

I’ve been headhunted, doubled my salary, bought a swank townhouse and a flash car and have enough money left over for an overseas holiday. But I’m still not happy…

That scenario, believe it or not, is afflicting a surprising number of South African women. Or so says Judy Klipin, the only South African trained by the wellknown American life coach and bestselling author Martha Beck. “A lot of the young women I see are riding high careerwise, but everything has changed so fast, they’re spinning out of control, losing touch with their essential selves,” she says. Some have come from disadvantaged backgrounds and their sudden wealth means they’re grappling with family expectations of support. Or they may be having to cope with unfamiliar cultural environments with social codes and power plays that might contradict those of their own culture.
“Many of these women haven’t had a chance to consider whether they are living the life they really want and where it’s taking them,” says Klipin. This scenario is typical of the discomfort of living a life in which their “essential self” is at odds with their “social self ”. Klipin says it is her job to help clients reconcile and integrate the two. Klipin’s relationship with Martha Beck, a regular columnist in Oprah Winfrey’s O magazine, came about precisely because she hadn’t claimed her own life, she reveals. A BA and HDipEd graduate from the then Wits University she’d worked in a range of organisations helping to transform their internal political cultures, but the new job she’d started was just wrong. “My body had already told me it was wrong. I was anxious, the feeling all of us get when we’re doing something at odds with our essential being,” she says. Not long into the position she resigned and in April last year she decided what she really wanted to do was the Martha Beck training course in the US. Klipin fired off a few e-mails and before she could fully grasp her luck, she was jetting off to Arizona, Beck’s headquarters.

After an intense course lasting only three days, she graduated not only with the confidence to advise others on their lives but also with robust accolades from the grande dame herself. Beck said Klipin was “smart, funny, sensitive, determined and intuitive” and someone she would recommend to anyone “who is feeling stuck, weary, confused, discouraged,uncertain, in need of support“.

Klipin now runs a practice in Craighall Park, conducts workshops and coaches clients one-on-one and by phone and e-mail.

“The Martha Beck approach is unlike psychotherapy in that we don’t spend all our time delving into your past,” says Klipin. “We look at where you are now and where you are going, by identifying current problems, then getting your commitment to follow a step-by-step healing process.” A good 15% of her clients are in the wrong careers, claims Klipin, while many of her clients are hindered by what she calls “limiting beliefs”. “A common one is ‘in order to be loved, I must do more for everybody else’,” says Klipin. “In trying to make others happy, women forget how to follow their own dreams. They’ve become over-dependent on their social selves.” In one of her programmes, Klipin combines her skills in crime prevention (she has a Masters in criminal justice from the University of Leicester) and coaching to address the widespread fear of crime. Research has shown that fear of crime is far higher than actual crime, she says, and this “limiting belief” impacts negatively on South Africa in a number of ways. Another common “limiting belief” she’s found in South African organisations is “we don’t have enough resources”, which translates to a lack of team drive. “I get the client to investigate what’s true, what’s not and to confront their fears and limiting beliefs head-on. It’s amazing to see the transformation in people in doing this. You literally see their whole face and body change,” says Klipin. The next stage is to identify goals, one of which must be a “wildly improbable goal” like the one Klipin thought she’d set when she sent the first e-mail to Beck. Intuition plays an enormous role in the process, even while using Beck’s tried-andtested tools and techniques. “A lot of people reveal more about themselves than they think by describing their house,” Klipin smiles.

 This article was originally featured in The Verve section of The Star Newspaper.

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  • “I have seen various psychologists and therapists but none of them have the skill of Judy in being able to relate to me and the way I think about things.” Emma, Durban
  • “Judy, you have given me the tools to change and move my life in directions I never knew possible. I am truly grateful for your help.” Anisha, London
  • “Perception is everything and working with Judy has helped me realise my true potential by changing my outlook of life into more positive ones. I enjoy walking out of a life coaching session feeling like I am in control again, less stressed and more energetic.” P.R.M.
  • “Judy is my go-to person when I find myself uncertain about how to interpret the signposts in my life. Her insights and ability to draw out what lies deepest inside have helped provide clarity and integrity at pivotal life moments over many years.” B.H.
  • “I’d recommend Judy to anyone who’s feeling stuck, weary, confused, discouraged, uncertain, in need of support – basically, I’d recommend her to any carbon-based life form that breathes oxygen and would like to have a wonderful life.” Martha Beck

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