Items tagged with "boundaries":
Dump the Situationship for a REALationship
I love the concept of a ‘situationship’ (actually I don’t love the concept so much as I love the name for the concept): not a relationship, not a friendship, but an ill-defined situation that exists between two people. We’ve all been there and done that. We’ve met someone who made our heart...
How to Cure a Case of Novemberitis (and Coviditis)
Every November I post my blog about Novemberitis. This year I have updated it to include the new affliction of Coviditis…. Ah November! Such an in between time of the year. Winter (or summer) has left and summer (or winter) hasn’t arrived. The current year is almost over and the new year hasn’t...
How to Get Ahead of the Lockdown Blues
Right now, many of us are baffled by what and how we are feeling. We fear that we are back in burnout even though we have worked so hard to get over it. We may be feeling irritable and more emotional than usual. Our relationships may become more fraught and conflictual, and we may be finding it extra...
3 Habits to Reverse Burnout
Every aspect of life is affected by burnout. When we have burnout, we are not just physically tired or emotionally delicate. We don’t just feel existentially unsure or question all our life choices. It’s not only that our brains feel mushy and we struggle to remember things. We are not merely easily...
Women and Burnout
Every year, there is much attention and fanfare about International Women’s day. The week that 8 March falls in is filled with news and views about women and the importance of recognising our importance. While some people are not convinced that there should be a day dedicated to thinking about women...
Plan to Spend Your Energy Wisely
God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change; courage to change the things I can; and wisdom to know the difference. ~ The Serenity Prayer Most of us are not short of courage or of wisdom. We are brave and wise beyond our years, and always have been. We have fought hard to...
Less Tired, More Inspired
If I could distil all of the things that my clients most yearn for into two things, they would be: Feeling less tired, and Feeling more inspired. It seems that more and more of us are feeling increased exhaustion and overwhelm, and decreased enthusiasm for things that we used to feel inspired...
How to Listen to Your Body
Have you ever got to the end of the day and realised that you forgot to have lunch? Or drink any water? Or that you’ve been gritting your teeth so hard that your neck and shoulders have gone into a spasm – and probably have been in it for hours? Sometimes (OK, often), work becomes so busy and...
From AlwaysOn to OftenOff
Happy Equinox! The 21st of March, in addition to being Human Rights Day in South Africa, is the Autumn/Spring Equinox. All over the planet, day and night both last 12 hours - give or take a few minutes. Dark and light are equally balanced. The sun and the stars get equal airtime. Nocturnal creatures...
How to Stay Sane in a World Gone Mad: 6 Ideas to Help You Stay Hopeful
I have started avoiding the news – in any and all forms. Things are so bad out there that it all feels too overwhelming. And, still, the horrors manage to filter through my defenses. Everywhere there is justified outrage about our incompetent-at-best and pathological-at-worst leaders, horror at...
Rebuild Your Resilience to Recover from Burnout
Have you ever found yourself saying, “if one more person asks me to do something I might crack”? Felt as though you are stretched so far that you fear you might snap? Had a to-do list that took on a life of its own, with each item you tick off being replaced by three or four more? All of...
Burnout Makes Us Feel Hapless, Hopeless and Helpless
We all have moments in our lives when we feel a little at sea and as though we have lost our way. When we feel as though we are bobbing around; isolated, lonely and afraid. When we question many of our life choices: work, love, friendships… Like a boat in a storm. We don’t know where we are going...
Sunday Night Blues
You’ve had a wonderful holiday. Resting, relaxing and being in the moment. No worrying about the report that is due, the presentation you need to make at the next meeting, the conversation with your hated boss/client/colleague that you have to have. No work worries at all. But, now, the party is...
Mind Your Own Business
Byron Katie says that there are three kinds of business: my business, your business and God’s business. She says that much of our discomfort and anxiety comes from getting out of our own business, or allowing others into ours. When we are in God’s business, we are concerning ourselves with things...
Is Your Relationship Burning Out?
Relationships, just like people, are living, breathing entities and are therefore vulnerable to the same complexities and challenges that individuals experience. Burnout is a modern condition that is increasingly prevalent amongst people and relationships – not just romantic relationships (although...
Resentment: Relationship Poison (and Its Antidote)
Keith pulls into his driveway after a long day at work. A sense of dread and disappointment descends; his mother-in-law’s car is there. Again. For the third time this week. And it is only Wednesday. Anna overhears her boyfriend inviting 12 of his closest friends to come over for a few drinks and...
Good Boundaries Make for Good Relationships
Imagine you had a neighbour who was always trying to tell how you to run your life; how to hang your laundry better, when to prune your roses, what colour to paint your walls. I’m guessing you’d find it pretty irritating and intrusive. Or if the person who lived next door was literally oblivious...
M is for…Mind Your Own Business
Mind Your Own Business Byron Katie says that there are three kinds of business in the world: my business, your business and G-d’s business. She says that much of our discomfort and anxiety comes from getting out of our own business, or allowing others into our business. When we are in other...
Email Overload
This blog is helping me to keep track of how I spend my time! I am somewhat ashamed to admit that, until now, I paid little attention to how I filled my working days. This last week or so of writing this blog has made me realize how much time I spend on admin and, in particular, on emails. I really...